The library. The place where most BITSians love to go to, whether it’s to study, read or laze around in the lounge. But every person who has visited the library at least once would have noticed that there are different breeds of people in the library. We, at DoJMA, have performed extensive research to figure out the different kinds of people in the library and have classified them into the following categories.

The Scholars:  No, we’re not talking about the fake ones who show just before the exams and sit in the library till 2 am. We’re talking about the real ones, the ones who go to the library even though the exams just got over, the ones whose ID cards have been scanned in the library more times than most students’ ID cards in the mess, the ones who spend more time in the library than the librarians themselves. They can be sighted behind towering piles of books, gazing at their laptop screen without blinking. Every night, when they are forced to leave the library, they curse the administration for fixing the closing time of the library at 11 pm.  

The Couples: They’re always there. You’re trying really hard to study for the next exam, and a couple is busy engaging in rather explicit wordless conversations. Their desecration of the Holy Library irks the Scholars.

The People Who Just Chill: You go to the library and see a group of people doing absolutely nothing! The entire time you’re there, they just keep talking and having fun. They are the arch-nemeses of the librarian, who furiously shushes them every ten minutes. You laugh to yourself and know that you’ll definitely get better grades than some people. Then the results come out and you wonder what the heck actually happened.

The Enlightened Ones and the Disciples: Having achieved mastery over the art of teaching (unlike most of our professors), the Enlightened Ones, akin to the Buddha, impart knowledge to their disciples, most of whom can testify to a life-altering increase in their GPA due to their sermons. However, people forget the Enlightened Ones, once the exams are over, just like they forget most of what they study.

The Missing Ones: The library is getting crowded and you realise that the ones whose stuff is on your table made a smart move by leaving personal belongings there and reserving a seat. But many hours pass by and they don’t reappear. The library is about to close now, but those books and that laptop are still there. Who are these people? Are they alive, or are they dead?

The Vagabonds: It’s hard to tell whether the vagabonds come to the library to study or to socialize. You never see them in the same spot for more than 10 minutes. They’ll immediately see another one of their friends and off they go. They travel lightweight too, just a pen and a book, which they never manage to open.

The Sofa Sleepers: The most comfortable place in the library and those people hog it all. They read for a while, but soon, the AC and soft cushions get the better of them. Their eyes slowly droop until they finally drop all pretense and go to sleep. They pay no heed to the librarian, who comes over and wakes them up with a caustic remark about not sleeping in the library, and fall asleep fifteen seconds later.

The Extension Cable Guy: You walk into the library and start working. Before you know it, your laptop’s battery is almost dead. You desperately search for a free port but compre is less than a week away and for some reason, people find that keeping a fan on in what is basically an oven at this point is valued greater than your charging needs. Then you spot your Messiah: a person sitting in a corner with an extension cable with three sockets. Until you see three laptops connected to it, leaving no socket free. Oh well.

The next time you’re in the library and you need a break, keep an eye out for these kinds of people. However, be careful to not get caught while observing others as they tend to find it creepy (no, this did not happen to us when we were researching for this article).